SMS and Jokes

Funny jokes (SMS)

We will now upgrade your brain, please wait....Searching....searching...still searching....sorry,NO BRAIN found...!

All the love that history knows is said to be in every rose!Yet all the love that could be found in two, is less than what I feel for you.

When a man talks dirty to a woman, it's sexual harassment. When a woman talks dirty to a man, it's $3.95 per minute.

Born Free. . . . .Taxed to Death.

I get enough exercise just pushing my luck!

Hard work has a future payoff. Laziness pays off NOW!

Always remember you're unique, just like everyone else.

Kiss my ass, and do it fast,suck my dick and do it quick.

Never let a man's mind wander, it's too little to be out on it's own!!!!

Their are moments in life when you really miss someone. And you wish you could just pluck them from your dreams......

Hi, do you want to have my children? No.?? ...Okay, then can we just practice?

Jesus loves you... everyone else thinks your an asshol

If you wanna be a hipi, put you flower in your pip

Do

Hi! Please stand by while this program enlarges your penis...........................ERROR: Your penis was not found! Sorry..............

It is good for girl to meet boy in park, but better for boy to park meat in girl.

God made man and then rested. God made women and then no one rested

CNN News. Bush orders 15,000 FBI trained dogs to track down Osama. FBI awaiting further orders as one of the dogs is reading this

This dog, is dog, a dog, good dog, way dog, to dog, keep dog, an dog, idiot dog, busy dog, for dog, 20 dog, seconds dog! ... Now read without the word dog.

I want to suck you... lick you... wanna move my tongue all over you...wanna feel you in my mouth...yep, tat's how u...eat an ice cream!

Don't spend $2 to dry-clean a shirt. Donate it to the Salvation Army instead. They'll clean it, put it on a hanger. Next morn buy it back for 50p.

Q:What is the difference between a wife and a girlfriend? A:About 45 pounds!!

I think drinking and driving is terrible. You always spill it when you change gears...

What did the elephant say to the naked man? How do you breathe through that thing?

I've used up all my sick days, so I'm calling in dead.

Boss: (to employee) - Experts say humor on the job relieves tension in this time of down-sizing, Knock, Knock. Employee: Who's there? Boss: Not you anymore.

Aim for the stars. But first, aim for their bodyguards.

What is the difference between a woman and a magnet? Magnets have a positive side!

Q: What does a blonde owl say? A: What, what?

What do you call a blonde hiding in a closet? The 1977 World Hide and Seek Champion.

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