SMS and Jokes

Quick Sex Jokes (Jokes)

Q. What does tightrope walking and getting a blowjob from your Grandma have in common ? A. You don't look down.

Q. Who can make more money in a week, a drug dealer or a prostitute? A. The prostitute because she can wash and resell her crack.

Q. How are women and linoleum floors alike? A. You lay them right the first time and you can walk all over them for the next 20 years.

Q. What's the difference between your paycheck and your cock? A. You don't have to beg your wife to blow your paycheck!

Q. What do you call kids born in whorehouses? A. Brothel sprouts.

Q. What's the difference between a 40 year-old man, and a 40 year-old woman? A. A 40 year-old woman dreams of having children, a 40 year-old man dreams of dating them.

Q. What's white, smells, and can be found in panties? A. Clitty litter Q. I married Miss Right. A. I just didn't know her first name was "Always."

Q. Why is psychoanalysis quicker for men than for women? A. When it's time to go back to his childhood, he's already there.

Q. How do you know when your cat's done cleaning himself? A. He's smoking a cigarette.

Q. Did you hear about the constipated mathematician? A. He worked it out with a pencil.

Q. Who's the world's greatest athlete? A. The guy who finishes first and third in a masturbation contest.

Q. Why do men pay more for car insurance? A. Women don't get blow jobs while they're driving

Q. Why do schools in West Virginia only have Drivers Ed two days a week? A. Because they need their cars for Sex Ed the other three days a week!

Q. Three words to ruin a man's ego... A. "Is it in?"

Q. What is the cheapest meat? A. Deer balls, there under a buck.

Q. How does a guy know if he has a high sperm count? A. If the girl has to chew, before she swallows.

Q. What's in the toilet of the star ship enterprise? A. The captains log.

Q. What do you call a woman with her tongue sticking out? A. A lesbian with a hard-on.

Q. What do you get when you cross Raggedy Ann and the Pillsbury Dough Boy? A. A red headed bitch with a yeast infection.

Q. What do you call two lesbians with their period? A. Finger painting.

Q. Did you hear they came out with a new lesbian shoe? A. They're called Dikes. They have an extra long tonge and only take one finger to get off!

Q. What's the difference between tampons and cowboy hats? A. Cowboy hats are for ass holes.

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Jokes