SMS and Jokes

Blonde (Jokes)

One day, a blonde and her friend were walking through the park. Suddenly, the blonde's friend said, "Oh, look, a dead birdie!" The blonde looked up and said, "Where?"

Because they have to pull their own pants down.

Why do blondes wear panties ? To keep their ankles warm.

What do blondes virgins eat ? Baby food .

What's the difference between a blonde and a walrus? One has whiskers and fishy flaps, and the other is a walrus.

What is foreplay for a blonde? Thirty minutes of begging.

What is a blondes idea of dental floss? Pubic hair.

What does a blonde put behind her ears to make her more attractive? Her ankles.

What do you say to a blonde that wont give up? Have another beer.

What do you call a zit on a blondes ass? A brain tumour.

How do you get a blonde pregnant? Cum in her shoes and let the flies do the rest.

How does a blonde try to kill fish? She tries to drown it.

How does a blonde hold her liquor? By the ears.

How do you know if a blonde likes you? She screws you two nights in a row.

How do you know a blondes just lost her virginity? Her crayons are still sticky.

Why can't blondes water ski? Because when they get their crotch wet they think they have to lie down.

What do you do if a blonde throws a pin at you? Run like hell as they still have the grenade in there mouth.

Why are blondes coffins "Y" shaped? When they lie on their backs their legs open.

What did the blondes mum say before the blondes date? If your not in bed by 12, come home.

Why did the blonde tiptoe past the medicine cabinet? So she didn't wake the sleeping pills.

Why did the blonde stop using the pill? Because it kept falling out.

Why aren't there many blonde gymnasts? Because when they did the splits they stuck to the floor.

Whats the difference between a fridge and a blonde? A fridge doesn't fart when you take the meat out.

What have a blonde and a moped got in common? They are both fun to ride until a friend sees you on one

What does a blonde and a lottery scratch card have in common? All you have to do is scratch the box to win.

What's the difference between a blonde and an inflatable doll? About two cans of hair spray.

What's the quickest way to get into a blondes pants? Pick them up off the floor.

What do you say to a blonde with no arms and no legs ? Nice tits!

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Jokes